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Easter Sunday 11th April

Went surfing early this morning with a few friends. The water’s beginning to get colder day by day as winter approaches and right on cue my trusty wetsuit split open as I was pulling it on. Three years of salt water, intense sun, being stretched on and off and generally abused has taken its toll on my dearly beloved protector, the second skin that has kept me warm in the freezing water, protected me from the strange and alien critters that inhabit the ocean, and hugged me securely as I’ve entered the unknown. I’d sew it up but the inside knee pads have fallen off, little ladder-runs are appearing in the fascia and the stitching is rotting in parts. I got pretty cold after 45 minutes in the water this morning thanks to the gaping hole in my butt seam. The ends of my fingers went a vivid shade of orange/yellow that blended into a deep purple past the knuckles and my jaw started to lock up, so I decided to swallow my tough girl pride and came out of the water first.

Finding the time to get out surfing these days is becoming nearly impossible as it’s an hour and a half trip from here to the surf beach. Since I started teaching on Saturday mornings, Sunday’s become the only day I can get down the coast, and to do that is to sacrifice the only quality time I get to spend with my boyfriend and my parents, so regular surf trips border on being guilt trips now. Every moment in my busy life is becoming so precious that I’m having to carefully scrutinize what is most important to me and weed out all that is unnecessary. But surfing is my holy communion…the ocean my altar where I soar above mediocrity to face my maker.

Mysore practice tomorrow and it will be my second one with David. I don’t’ think he’ll let me get away with the half hearted practice I’ve been doing lately and I’m sort of looking forward to that. I may as well make the most of these last few classes at the shala as I prepare for the transition to a life without them.

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Good Friday 9th April

I’m serenely soaking up a milky espresso, quietly recovering from David’s led primary practice this morning. Suspended in lethargy at my kitchen table, eyeing off the sink full of dishes patiently waiting to be cleaned up to their Sunday best.
The practice was way too intellectual for me this morning, the right brain being yanked out of it’s quiet corner, called into the yoga arena to translate David’s precise anatomical instructions into the body’s awareness.
The feeling left brain which I usually practice with, that merges joy and love with the process was made redundant this morning, discarded and left behind as the new approach took off with a sharp turn of direction.
In the few led practices I’ve done with David, he’s brought an agenda and worked on one or two particular points throughout each practice. These points get hammered and imprinted into your memory. This morning we had to focus on drawing the frontal hip points together, the lower ribs inwards and squeezing the pectorals toward center, in EVERY pose. All of these energetic movements David said were preparing us for the Supta Kurmasana finale. By that time my body had reluctantly absorbed and become familiar with the focus of the morning, so I was disappointed when Supta Kurmasana wasn’t any better than the usual pathetic.

David is very specific in how we should move whereas Simi has always allowed a little creativity. In Surjanamaskar B, he insists we touch the nose to the knees in the initial squat, extend the arms forward, palms together, then lift the head, the eyes spot the thumbs as the arms lift to the Utkatasana position (ekam). When stepping the foot forward from Dog Pose (sapta and ekadasa) the nose firstly touches the bent knee the arms extend forward, palms together, then the head lifts and eyes spot the thumbs as the arms lift to the Virabhadrasana 1 position. Along with many others, I’ve always swept my arms out to the sides and up to these positions so again another way of moving to wake the body up out of its comfy routines.

Revelation #1 for me this morning was the instruction to move into standing poses by pivoting on the heel. After jumping from Samistithi to the parallel feet position, the back foot has to stay put as you pivot on the front heel. I’ve always turned my back foot in and front foot out by pivoting on the balls of the feet. Now I’m more than confused, but I’ll start practicing David’s way, trusting that it’s Guruji’s way.

Revelation #2 this morning was being instructed to roll the shoulders forward and down in the Marichyasanas. Throughout my years of Iyengar training, I’ve always rolled them back and down, collarbones broad, chest open and lifting. David encourages a slight collapse of the chest here, a curling in of the front body. It reoccurred in a few poses, including Parsvottanasana where we held the elbows behind our back and rolled the shoulders forward rather than the usual pulled back shoulder, reverse namaste position of the arms and hands.

Revelation #3 was in Padangusthasana/Padahastasana where we had to draw the shoulderblades together rather than try and broaden them. I’m not quite so convinced about that one, but I’ll play with it anyway.
Setu Bandha Sarvangasana was inserted to ease us into the backbends but three repetitions of it showed up the lack of holding power in my legs. The resulting jelly legs surprised me, but I was even more surprised by my Urdhva Dhanurasanas which were really strong. My legs and arms energized and supported a beautiful lift and curve which increased in power with each repetition. I wanted to do more than three, but David called Paschimottanasana and I was forced to move on feeling a little unfulfilled.

The Ashtanga situation is all a bit strange right now. If the fee hike isn’t reversed in response to the grumblings from the students, I’ll be moving on and will have to draw my inspiration from the occasional workshops by visiting teachers like Glenn Ceresoli (next month) and Shandor. I may try to organize a regular group practice in the art gallery space where I work. It’s a perfect yoga studio, quite big, polished wooden floors, high ceilings, artwork on the walls. Just got to arrange ourselves around the occasional floor installations.

Espresso’s kicked in now but my body’s stiffened up. Domestic chores await me as I wake up into the day; the memory of the early morning practice is fading like an elusive dream.

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Sunday 4th April

Shift happens…again.
David’s just returned from teaching overseas and it was quite abruptly announced to us all last week that he’d be taking over the morning Mysore classes for at least the next 3 months. Along with that change comes a rather shocking doubling of shala fees. I’ve been paying a very reasonable $200 (Australian $) for 20 classes over a maximum of 2 months which has allowed me to get to 2-3 classes a week. The unnegotiable cost from next week is a flat $190 per month. Regular 5 day a week students will probably continue on but there’s only 3 or 4 of them, so I wonder what the fall out will be. I think a lot of the dedicated part timers like me will find the price hike unpalatable. Other options for payment are $60 per week or $17 per class but these are also hard to swallow considering the most expensive yoga studio classes here are $13 (gyms are a bit more expensive).

I’ve probably got about 6 classes to go to use up my credit. It’s disappointing, but change is not only inevitable, it’s a reliable precurser for growth, so we’ll see what portent the universe throws up in its place. Could just be a daily self practice working with the poses Simi’s given me up to Salabhasana. Unfortunately self discipline is not my forte. I’ve always relied on external classes or commitments to keep up a consistent practice. Lazy girl, really.

I went to David’s led Primary practice last Friday , but being his first one since arriving back, he was indulging a bit of his artistic yoga licence. Instead of the traditional sequence done on this day, he broke down a lot of the poses. We spent 5 breaths in each of the suryanamaskar positions, lowering completely to the floor before moving into Upward Dog pose. He talked a lot about the feet and had us keep the base of the big toe lifting up throughout the practice and a consistent awareness of the connection between the center knee and the center hip, in EVERY pose. Grappling with these internal intricacies spoils the flow of the practice for me and the flow is the reason I chose to regularly practice Ashtanga rather than Iyengar.
To get into Utthita Parsvakonasana, David had us first assume Horse Stance (standing with feet very wide apart, toes pointed way out and squatting very low, sort of like a ballet plie in second position - here's a little info on it). From there we stayed in the squat but straightened one leg to get into Utthita Parsvakonasana. It didn’t feel right because the back foot was still turned waaaay out instead of in.
Strange and amusing diversions like that punctuated the practice. Not one mention of mulabandha. I can’t remember how far through the series we got but I know we didn’t make it to Navasana. He had the good sense to say that he’d lead a normal primary series in future, but I’m still left wondering about his departure from the traditional Friday practice. David is one of only five fully certified teachers in Australia, so I was expecting a very strictly counted traditional practice. Oh well, next Friday is Good Friday so Darren’s led Iyengar class won’t be on. I’ll try David again next Friday.

I know I’m grumbling a bit and I don’t feel so good about that. I just wasn’t prepared to lose lovely Simi and the ritual of morning Mysore classes at this fundamental stage in my Ashtanga journey. But in the big picture, the teacher is in me and the journey is my own. You don’t learn to fly until you get thrown out of the nest.

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